


15 Rules for Visiting Chicago

by Solo2814



Series: Skippy's List: Avenger's Style [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Dresden Files - All Media Types, The Dresden Files - Jim Butcher
Genre: Gen, Skippy's List
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-03
Updated: 2014-03-03
Packaged: 2018-01-14 11:52:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1265518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Solo2814/pseuds/Solo2814
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Avengers get a visit from a Certain Wizard Private Eye.</p><p>In Return Fury gets a new headache and a whole new batch of Rules.</p>
            </blockquote>





	15 Rules for Visiting Chicago

**Author's Note:**

> I own neither The Avengers nor the Dresden Files. 
> 
> But I like to thank Stan Lee and Jim Butcher for making my life a beautiful miserable place.

1\. Lt. Murphy has twelve marksmanship trophies and an eighth level black belt in Aikido. Proceed with caution.

  
2\. Ms. Gard is not Agent Romanoff’s sister.

3\. Captain Rogers is to stop all attempts to have John Marcone jailed, deported, and/or teleported to a different dimension.

4\. Do not teach Agent Barton invisibility spells.

5\. Dr. Banner is not allowed to steal any of the Swords of the True Cross in an attempt to debunk them.

6\. Ms. Potts is perfectly happy in her current position and will not be joining the ranks of the Sihde courts.

7\. Mouse is not the Hulk’s hairy cousin.

8\. No one is allowed to ask about Monoc Securities.

           a. Or Thor’s sudden employment there.

9\. No one is allowed to Summon Santa Claus.

10\. Anyone tempted to hit on Lara or Thomas Raith is reminded that their sex aura does not equal consent.

11\. All parties will stop suggesting that Mr. Kincaid and Agent Romanoff attempt to conceive a perfect homicidal agent of death.

12\. Mr. Stark will make no more attempts to become the Ho-Ho Lord, Chocolate Baron, Marshmallow Knight or any other type of Faeire Nobility.

13\. Agent Coulson is not allowed to hound the Wardens of the White Council if they fought side by side with Captain America or ask them for souvenirs.

14\. No one is allowed to drench Agent Hand or Deputy Director Newt in Garlic Juice and Holy Water to see if they really are vampires.

15\. No Dinosaurs. Stop asking.


End file.
